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Monday, May 15, 2006
THE LAW OF THINGS
The Bats
The Law of Things
Flying Nun : 1990
[Buy It]
I LOVE ROCK AND ROLL
Girl Authority
Girl Authority
Zoe Records : 2006
[Buy It]
GIN AND COCONUT WATER
Calypso Mama
Calypso Mama with the Lad Richards Orchestra
Digital Pressure : 2001
[Buy It]
KIMBERLY
Patti Smith
Horses
Arista : 1975
[Buy It]
You know you're a single mom when you find yourself planning your own Mother's Day. Not the time to cheap out and buy yourself off with a guilty Hallmark or some plastic-wrapped stuffed animal from the back of a van. Single moms need to try harder. We're at a disadvantage in the culture. White single moms are slutty, self-indulgent, flakes, occasionally redeemed by distinguished public service. And black single moms? Don't even get me started. Black single moms don't get movies, just problem literature and statistical reports.
Me, I'm more like that hippied-out mom in About a Boy, the one who cries a lot and ODs? My daughter was the one who noticed. But this was Mother's Day and I wanted to be one of those other mothers: the precision moms who bake things in shapes and serve them on tasteful dinnerware in color-coordinated rooms. Mothers who turn grocery shopping into enrichment opportunities for their soon-to-be-achieving children.
Since I was being the Mom Who Tries, I called my best friend to get her and her two kids on board with some plans. One of the museums downtown was having a family day (giant comic strips! frisbee dogs!). There was a mother-daughter yoga class that sounded healthful and inviting. Perhaps a stroll through the botanic gardens or a restorative bike ride? Oh, how the weekend sang with possibilities!
But the weather was crappy and cold; the frisbee dogs were rained out and the kids didn't want to be enriched. They wanted a sleepover. I pictured myself waking them Sunday morning, gently, clad in an apron and the enticing aroma of biscuits. I put the three girls in my car and took them home. Actually, I hadn't done the weekly shop yet and the fridge was nearly empty. So I stuffed them full of deep-fried Chinese take-out and rented the Addams Family and SpongeBob. They liked the Addams Family, who were "Goths" and "not cheesy like Goosebumps." They were up past midnight, giggling and whispering in their sleeping bags, in a tent in my daughter's room.
Breakfast wasn't biscuits. We didn't make the yoga class. At noon, the guests were long gone and my daughter was slumped on the couch with uncombed hair. Hair she'd dyed red without my permission because she wanted to be a rock star for Halloween. Hair that was still red in May. (She's eight.) She gave me a card she'd made in school. It said, "Mom, I love you as much as I love my dog and I will love you until the moon is a fish." She really loves the dog and the moon is not a fish.
We decided to hit the Indian buffet. The lines were short and my Mother's Day lassi was on the house. The produce market next door was kicking Earth, Wind & Fire and limes were 10 for a dollar. Our whole little family - my daughter and her friends, and me and mine - gathered for dinner. I used the limes for caipirinhas and we toasted the weekend good-bye. But who'd make a movie like that?
- by Megan MatthewsLabels: holidays, megan
posted by James
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